damia and dhia
When i have her, I am still in university (read my first entry 5 years back here) and only 22 years old, I remember juggling studies and taking care of her. It was hard but it taught me to be strong. Daytime, i went to class and she, to babysitter, night I play with her until she sleep then i continued my study. Its tiring, but it makes me appreciate my life and my relationship with her. There was also time when I make a fuss about her but it just my hormones talking, I love her to the deepest.
After I finished my study, I am between job, we don't have money. sometimes i have to leave her with my mom when I get a new job that required my full time and concentration. It hurt me so much, but its for the better, for both of us. I cried in my heart countless time, for the lack of time that I spent with her. But being a mom is not as easy as being a single girl. Every step that we take come with great consequences not only to us but to our kids. People judgement is always on us, of course they are few that wants to understand and help, but how far people can see the weight of the world on you.
Now, I am an Engineer, a career woman. I can get her education and good life. Yes I am a single parent but my love for her and her sister is enough for both of them. But one thing for sure, she walk the same path that i walk, be it a hard, bumpy and terrible or easy and smooth one. For that she know me well, for that she is the best young 5 years old girl ever and for that she is my BEST FRIEND.